Wad's wrong with Ming Li?

Feeling super down now.. No more tears though..

Started working in CE for a month.. Adapting well I guess..

Yup got scolding from parent.. Made a stupid mistake and report to work at 7am instead of 1.30pm.. Small matters I guess..

Super sian with working life.. 1 day off a week.. rotating shift.. bf complaining of weekends w/o me.. Yes I regretted my choice.. But a 16 yr old choosing a career is like that de ma.. I was wrong to choose nursing when the whole world told me not to.. But it's okay.. I'll at least finish my bond in 2011.. I'm surviving.. No worries..

As for relationship, I thought I've accepted him for who he is.. But realised it's too hard to love him the way he is.. Walking past his parents made me feel awkward and I'll look away.. His friend called him saying wanna meet me makes me sad.. Saying he wanna have a facebook account reminds me of friendster incident.. Whenever he dun wanna meet me, bad memories were recalled.. Just had a 10 min cry.. Let's hope no swollen eyes tomorrow though I've got no plans for tmr's off day..

3 years plus of complaining and suffering is soo boring.. This relationship is full of disappointment.. Wish I can start over again.. I want someone normal.. who'll bring me home, who'll bring me out with his friends.. I dunno whether to wait for my prince to appear or wait for him to change.. wait for him to help me let go of the past by giving me a future..

When people ask, yup I'm in my first relationship which has lasted 3 yrs plus.. sounds so xin fu.. yet it's not.. Yes it's sweet when we go dating.. full of laughter.. But he's sleeping with his hp switched off now ignoring my cries.. Wad am I supposed to do with this kinda 'love'? Tired.. Yet not letting go..

No pictures for this post.. Simply lazy to post pic.. anyway its just a few pics taken on sunday when I meet up with my long-time friends.. Had lotsa laughter with them eating sakae sushi..

Ming Li no longer take pictures frequently.. She's changed.. Cos happiness forgotten her..

Save me.. I'm not suffering from depression YET.. I still blog means I'm still alive..

Already booked my 2nd attempt for driving test.. But didn't go for any lessons.. Ya perhaps I'll fail the 2nd time.. But my irregular work routine simply leaves me no chance for driving.. schedule come out 2 wks early but booking lessons need to be a month early nowadays..

Nothing is going well for me.. Since I stepped out of poly.. Life has changed.. Trying hard to be myself again.. The happy Ming Li.. laughter is short-lived now..

To kat etc, dun be surprised by such a depressed post.. I know U care.. I'm still the Ming Li who talk crap who laugh with U, I know I'm loved.. I love gatherings with u all.. It makes me forget unhappiness for awhile..

To poly frenz.. Perhaps I've not been putting in effort to keep our friendships going.. But I cherish the memories.. Thanks for making poly life great.. See u all on 26th (graduation)..

To end this post, I still love my family, my friends and him.. I'll love myself more.. Wait for me.. Ming Li will be back..




HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY TO MAY!! May all wishes come true!