Weekend is almost over..

Last nite he asked me go yishun walk walk.. So i met him 7.20 at the 912 bus stop..

We walked to admiralty and went pasar malam walk walk and buy food and drinks..

Then we take 969 go Chong Pang walk walk..

Bought Choc Pokkie and mac ice cream..

Then he ate Roti prata and teh tarik..

We rented 'The Oh in Ohio" from a machine outside North Point..

Then we meet my mum at the pasar malam to help her bring back stuffs she bid..

Reached home around 12 am then I go bathe and bf n I watch the dvd..

As he saw me taking out contact lens before i bathed he commented that oh he has a wife who take out eyeball.. Dots.. So I asked ur ex nv wear ontact lens meh twice then he replied yes but he nv go her hse b4 ma.. And I probe him.. As I know that's a lie. And true enough he went her house before lor.

We lie in bed at 2 plus.. He hugged me but I dun wanna hug him so i type an sms in his hp saying abt yet another lie.. I tried to ignore the feeling of being deceived but i just can't. Bcos as i lie in bed, the fear of him with all his lies and the pain just came back like I relived the hurtful events.

Haiz.. And so he slept.. This reminds me of 1 1/2 yrs ago, I keep asking him his frds know he got gf anot.. His answer is always yes.. I didn't believe him.. So I use his hp to sms 3 gals and they all dunno my existence.. That nite I didn't sleep.. I couldn't bear to sleep beside a liar..

And last nite I realised he has not changed.. He's still full of lies... I really dun understand why.. Perhaps truth hurts..

Well in the end I hugged him while he's asleep..

Woke up at 8am as his hp alarm ring.. He didn't hug me.. Just raised his voice and order me to quickly go prepare cos we had said to go woodlands point eat breakfast.. I was angry. I'm not a dog. So I said I dun wanna go and sent him out to my door.. He did not bother to coax me.

After 10 mins of calming down.. I called him.. He was already at the bus stop. I sms him if he's going alone. He said he's waiting for me. That's bullshit. He didn't even bother to call me. It's just that just nice he haven board the bus lor. So I replied that I'm tired of being obedient like a dog and he would have waited for me under my block if he wanted me to go. Well he's a loner anyway.

So I lie in bed feeling angry and hurt. I was biting my thumb hard cos physical pain can make heartache diminish for a moment. Okay I'm a little psychotic at times.

And then I decided to go find him. To be happy or upset is a choice. I know i can't fall back asleep. I know if I dun do anything my sunday will be a really bad one.

So I called him to ask him dun go eat first cos I'm on my way. He said he wanna wait for me I dun want then have to go alone very sian one. I dun wish to quarrel with him. And he said he'll wait for me. So I took the bus alone there. It's a first time. And I realise I didn't really open my eyes during the journey with him so many times cos i past some infrastructure that I never noticed before and was wondering if I had missed the bus stop. Just like since I'm attached I never look at guys. My bf always say that I dun give better guys a chance.

When he saw me, he held my hand. I didn't bother to fight with him.

So we had Mac breakfast. I tried the new wasabi fillet-o-fish. I didn't like it so the last 1/4 i exchanged with him and eat mcGriddle. One good thing about him is that he's never fussy about food.

After which we walked around at woodlands centre and he bought earpiece for me for $15 cos my earpiece is spoiled.

Then we took 903 to wdl mrt and took train to bugis. He bought me a $5 watch bcos my nurses' watches are spoiled and I need a watch.

We shop till 1 plus then head to sun plaza to have our lunch.

At 3 plus it was still raining heavily so when we ran to the bus stop, we were drenched.

We were shivering in the bus and he rubbed my hand and thigh to provide me warmth. yes that's sweet.

And he lent me $80 cos I'm broke. I'll return him on sat..

Anyway these 2 days we saw 4 girls whose dress are so short that the panties can be seen and the heels are just so high.

Especially today got 2 girls go orchard at 11 plus. The dress short still nvm, it was white and so thin that we can see red bra with black panty. We both think that they're sluts. And i said they r prostitute is it and my bf said they're escorts. Well many poly, JC and uni girls are working these kinda part-times to earn their sch fees and their LV bags etc.

I said nowadays alot of these kinda girls no choice. Then my bf said that even in ancient times also got prostitutes wad. So I replied, last time they were ashamed of their work. Now these girls are proud cos they think they can be in this line bcos they have assets. So my bf said they change ten bfs do with all ten so doesn't make a difference anymore and somemore can earn lotsa money.

Well I've received email from such company looking for escorts. And got a guy who email me twice about wanting to 'bao' me for 3 times a week during office hour and 3k/mth cos he saw my pics in friendster. Of course I ignored these people.

Haiz.. The world has changed. Nowadays sex is just nothing to most people.

Wasted saturday..

He went home at 7 plus.

I continue to sleep till 11 plus.

Online until 2 plus.

Went Facial at Vista Point from 3 to 4 plus. It's my 4th time going for facial since 16 I think.

It was painful as usual.

Thought bf will date me out but he said it's late and his parents cook dinner alr.

I'm disappointed. Really tired of him.

So I watch HK drama then now my mum wanna watch channel U so I came online to do my homework. Haiz. Weekend also cannot rest. Wad an attachment.

Dreading monday cos must take case.

Thinking of conversation with 2 girls whom I know thru attachment. They're not bonded. They will not be working as a nurse cos nursing is just so different from wad they expected. And I must say that me too.

Since year 1 I regreted my choice. It's stressful and busy and not all patients or their relatives appreciate u. I'm tired of nursing after 3 yrs of attachment. But I shall strive on to finish my 2 yrs bond.

After the 2 yrs bond, I'll either get a degree in nursing or change career path completely. If I shall cont. nursing, my aim is to be a lecturer. Haha. Seems like fat hope girl.

I used to think that interest is the most important thing when choosing career, I guess now I realise we work bcos we need money to survive. That's reality.

I'm already 19. Wondering how many yrs I still have. I'm tired of living. Ha-ha.

Here's question 10 which i dunno y I missed out..

Do you have any regrets?

Yes I do. I regret not hugging my grandma and tell her I love her before she passed away.

I regret loving my bf.

I regret choosing nusing.

Well life is just full of regrets.

But I'll make the best out of my choices.

I'm not angry anymore.

He's sleeping on my bed. I've forgiven him I guess cos I love him. I shall go and hug him now. Yes Ming Li is just so soft-hearted that her bf bully her.

Since Celest tag me, I shall play the game.. w/o tagging anyone. Lolz... Cos no one to tag la..

RULE #1 People who have been tagged must write their answers on their blogs and replace any question that they dislike with a new question formulated by themselves.

RULE #2 Tag 5 people to do this quiz and those who are tagged cannot refuse. These people must state who they were tagged by and cannot tag the person whom they were tagged by continue this game by sending it to other people.

1. Do you have secrets?

Hmmm.. My bf know every single thing abt me. So I can say that I've got no secrets.

2. Would you fall in love with a boy younger than you?

I always say i'll not, but perhaps i will if he's the prince I'm waiting for..

3. Do you enjoy going to school?

Yup. Cos I've lots of friends in school.. And as compared to work, school is the best thing. I'm already missing my carefree poly life..

4. What would you do with a billion dollars?

Put in bank and collect interest. Go travelling with my loved ones. Buy lots of clothes etc etc...

5. Will you fall in love with your best friend?

Whoever I fall in love with shall be my best friend. So now besides my bf, I dunno who is my best friend.

6. Which is more blessed, loving someone or being loved by someone?

Definitely being loved by someone. But sad to say, I'm fated to suffer in love with someone whom I love him much more than he loves me. Only got myself to blame, I never give any chance to other guys who will love me more than they love themselves.

7. What is one song U wish ur guy will sing to u?

I'll never break ur heart - backstreet boys

8. If the person you secretly like is already attached, what would you do?

Will try my best to put down my feelings for him and hope he last happily forever with his girl.

9. Is there anything that has made you extremely happy?

I'm very sad. bcos I dun think so. Haiz.

11. How would you see yourself in 10 years time?

A blessed 29 year old who is still young though married happily with kids.

12. Who are currently the most important people to you?

Everyone around me.

13. What kind of person do you think the person that tagged you is?

A strong girl who deserves to be loved by a great man.

14. Would you rather be single and rich or married but poor?

The second one i guess.

15. What is your favourite colour?

White, pink, blue etc. Lolz.

16. Would you give all in a relationship?

Yes.

17. If you fall in love with two people simultaneously, who would you pick?

Will that ever happen? I guess I'll choose whoever comes first.

18. What are the top five countries on your 'to-go' list?
Hong Kong
U.S
Taiwan
Japan
Korea

19. Do you prefer being single or having a relationship?

I've always yearn for love. Can't stand singlehood anymore.

It's finally friday!

Last night was really flare up with my bf cos he never come fetch me before nvm. But he's even unwilling to talk to me while i walk home alone from admiralty. He said I'm irritating yet again. I hate him to the core.

I mentioned breakup and ask him to reflect. Tonight the same thing repeats though in the morning and afternoon he said he know he dun cherish me, he can't bear for us to part wadeva shit.

He's now in my room but I'm angry with him. He just dun love me as much as he loves himself. Selfish and self-centred. Can't believe my bad taste. Can't help feeling stupid to fall into this endless pit, a trap he set.

perhaps Katherine was right these 2 yrs plus. He's not worth having me. I deserve a much better guy than this.

So bad lor..

My bf just now sms me say he not going home tonight.. So I called him immediately for fear that no reception again.. And he said he today, tmr and fri not coming back cos exercise end late like 10 pm.. I was so upset lor.. Then I asked him where is he cos the background sounds noisy unlike camp.. He said in train.. Walau! My hearing is so good lor.. I was suspecting the background is train liao lor.. So I hung up on him then he called me back.. SUPER BAD MAN!! He said wanna surprise me.. Rubbish lor.. Hai me sad for nth.. Anyway he said he not going home but coming straight to meet me cos last nite never meet.. So I asked him buy Roti Prata for me and mum for dinner. Hehe.. I love him!!